Thursday, August 16, 2007

Tommy-Helps-Me-Dream and Some Fragments

Hello All,

Here's a picture of me in front of the computer, and a picture of Angie on the computer. I'm going to record a dream I had almost exactly five months ago, and then record some brief fragments I remember from last night and the night before. The older dream I had about a co-worker named Tommy. Tommy and I both descended into one of life's darker oubliettes at the same time. Our problems had different causes and expressions, but I think the fact we were both in a downward spiral caused a certain understanding between us. I'm no longer in contact with Tommy, and last I heard he was in a rehab in Canada.

In the dream, my mother had a house in a swamp. The house was so overcome by the swamp around it, that the back-end of it was sinking into the water. If you went into the rooms in the back of the house, their very edges were underwater, and most of the floorboards had moss and mold on them. I went to my mother's house to retrieve something from it, something sentimental. I brought friends with me because the trip was too dangerous for me to take myself. We retrieved some of my precious childhood belongings, and trekked back through the swamp. We had to swim across a deep reservoir to get back to the road. The depth of the water felt more threatening because night had fallen, and now the water and land around me were equally black.

When I got back to the road I realized I had left something very dear to my heart in my mother's swamp house, I'm pretty sure it was the very thing I had set out to get in the first place. I felt so upset! Out of all the people with me, only Tommy felt bad enough for me that he agreed to go back with me, even though it was a frightening trip. I really think this dream was reminding me of some warm-heartedness or understanding that I got from Tommy during my "crazy." Perhaps it's just a dream, but there is a lot I don't remember from that time. So, I feel the need to say, "Thank you Tommy."

The past two nights have been a bit restless, so I've only remembered some dream fragments. The night before last I had a dream I was in class with Michael May. I kept a telephone in my desk. I went home that night and drove back to class the next day, but when I was driving to class my car's engine just stopped. I managed to coast the car into a parking spot near the building I had to go to. I was very upset and hoped Michael would help me, but I wanted to try and get someone else's help first, so he wouldn't feel I was imposing on him.

I went to my desk, but someone had taken my phone. I said, "where's my phone?" and Michael told me he just put it in a cubby by the door. I went to the area, but didn't see it, and needed him to take the phone out for me. I felt stupid for needing his help anyway, just to get the phone to call someone for help with my car.

Last night, I completely forgot my dream even though I was aware I was dreaming. I thought very hard and was able to dredge up the last scene. A man and I were courting each other, but hadn't started dating yet. As a gift, my dad gave the man a large quilt. However, the quilt had been used as a death shroud before, and my suitor was too uncomfortable to use it. My dad was very angry he didn't use the gift, and I tried to explain to my dad it was an inappropriate gift. I hoped he would understand why the man wouldn't use it.

Thank you for reading,


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